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Well This Is Awkward...

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It has to be one of my many, many bad jokes that I just blurt out without thinking.

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I made a cancer joke (accidently, I'd forgotten) to my friend who had cancer...

 

I was such a fucking idiot.

 

But that's hillarious!

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well, i have alot of moments were i absentmindedly accused people of being peados, (friends, not strangers in the street) forgetting that a friend of mine had a run in with onw while younger, though as she wasnt actualy touched by the guy i dont think its too bad.

 

most awkward moment for me in a while was in april, out for a friends birthday, a girl who i really fancy was out with us, and i was actualy doing really well with her, making jokes that had her laughing, that she kept going back to over and over, i was, for once, actualy being charming, cool and dare i say it, appealing to the the fairer sex.

 

then my friend leans accross the full table, at the most quiet moment on earth to say "sarah is totaly sleeping with chris tonight!" every one sort of blushed, conversation dropped, and it took a few moments for things to go back to normal. took him sligtly longer to say it again. then again, then again.

 

night ended with me being all swarve and loverly, walking her home with arms linked, a fair bit from the rest of the group, making her laugh and finding out about her life. every few moments we got a "shes so going to bed with him!" from the same stupid guy. needless to say, when we get home she goes straight to bed (without me) and im left looking at his stupid face.

 

 

i suppose he owed me, hed broken up with his gf, and i spent a good hour telling him he was better off without her and that id never cared for her that much. few days later i walk into our kitchen to make and guess who i saw standing there?

 

oh, and anouther mates ex once, randomly i might add, told anouther mates gf she wasnt pretty enough for him. cant imagine that going well

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n most times being in at work is awkward.. im known as the weird one. they just dont get my HUMOR :)

 

I know the feeling. :heh:

 

We should start a club.

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I was just thinking of my most awkward one, and then it hit me.

 

GOD! This is just awful.

 

This a few years ago, like 2-3 years ago. I was sitting in Maths, and so one does, for no explainable reason, I got one of those really annoying semi-erections...how that happened through long division is anyone's guess.

 

Anyway, I knew that it would go away by the end of the lesson, and thought to myself "I hope I don't get called up...why would I though? They never call us up to write on the board!"

 

Of course, about 5 minutes later, the teacher did. I was shitting myself when the teacher called out my name. I like sat there for a few seconds silent, then said "Um...oh by the way! I think I have that homework...*digs around in bag*..for you. Oh wait, I don't."

"Just hurry up and come up to the front!"

I sort of stood-up and knew I needed a few seconds to stall, before I could actually leave my desk fully.

"*stares at board with fake concentration, whilst still half stood, half sat* ...Actually, I don't know If I know the answer to this one..."

"But we just went over it!"

"Oh, right you are. :)"

 

At that point I was able to go to the front and complete whatever equation I had to.

 

So it was potentially FAR worse, but no one knew/realised.

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I was just thinking of my most awkward one, and then it hit me.

 

GOD! This is just awful.

 

This a few years ago, like 2-3 years ago. I was sitting in Maths, and so one does, for no explainable reason, I got one of those really annoying semi-erections...how that happened through long division is anyone's guess.

 

Anyway, I knew that it would go away by the end of the lesson, and thought to myself "I hope I don't get called up...why would I though? They never call us up to write on the board!"

 

Of course, about 5 minutes later, the teacher did. I was shitting myself when the teacher called out my name. I like sat there for a few seconds silent, then said "Um...oh by the way! I think I have that homework...*digs around in bag*..for you. Oh wait, I don't."

"Just hurry up and come up to the front!"

I sort of stood-up and knew I needed a few seconds to stall, before I could actually leave my desk fully.

"*stares at board with fake concentration, whilst still half stood, half sat* ...Actually, I don't know If I know the answer to this one..."

"But we just went over it!"

"Oh, right you are. :)"

 

At that point I was able to go to the front and complete whatever equation I had to.

 

So it was potentially FAR worse, but no one knew/realised.

 

Hahah! The half sitting/standing bit sounds like a scene straight out of a lolztastic movie.

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Hahah! The half sitting/standing bit sounds like a scene straight out of a lolztastic movie.

 

Agreed, it sounds like it came straight from a comedy film. :)

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One time at reading festival we were all sitting about the camp drinking and having a laugh. For some reason there was this random bloke sitting with us. No-one really knew who he was friends with but, anyway, he was a little strange and quite reserved. He didn't say a word all night. Eventually the conversation led to talking about our dads and stuff, and my mate thought it would be friendly to ask this newcomer about his dad... "he's dead" were the only words we heard from him, and there was complete silence from about 20 people. It was so awkward. You never really know what to say when someone reveals something like that, least of all when it's a really weird stranger.

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One time at reading festival we were all sitting about the camp drinking and having a laugh. For some reason there was this random bloke sitting with us. No-one really knew who he was friends with but, anyway, he was a little strange and quite reserved. He didn't say a word all night. Eventually the conversation led to talking about our dads and stuff, and my mate thought it would be friendly to ask this newcomer about his dad... "he's dead" were the only words we heard from him, and there was complete silence from about 20 people. It was so awkward. You never really know what to say when someone reveals something like that, least of all when it's a really weird stranger.

 

haha, ohhhhh dear. I have had so many awkward moments, somehow I just always get caught saying the worst things at the worst times. I have to gap it to bed now, hopefully I'll remember to come back to this thread after work tomorrow :)

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Hahah! The half sitting/standing bit sounds like a scene straight out of a lolztastic movie.

 

I knew you'd appreciate that! :bouncy:

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Getting caught by my mother in her best cocktail dress was pretty awkward.

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Getting caught by my mother in her best cocktail dress was pretty awkward.

 

I would imagine so. How old were you?

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Drama 'lessons' every week in year 7 and 8 were the most awkwardest moments i can think of. Standing up and acting like a prick infront of a class full of people i hated anyway wasn't the most fun thing to do.

 

I remember one time we had to act out a song (to the lyrics) and we picked Tribute by Tenacious D because we thought it would be easy, we forgot about the 30 second solo in the middle and it was just a big awkward air guitar session infront of 25 people. I feel embarrassed just thinking about it.

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Oh bloody hell Strider, you've reminded me of something.

 

I changed secondary schools 6 weeks before the end of year 8. So I was at my new school...and Id only been there for about 2 weeks or so I guess, so we had a drama lesson. This activity seemed like the most ridiculous thing in the world....we sat in a circle, then one person stood in the middle, and had to chose someone of the opposite sex to take their place in the middle, and say something like "Im Blah, and I want to switch places with....X" and then point at them. So It came to my turn, and I was like "I want to switch places with....Hannah" and I pointed at this girl in my class.....and of course her name wasnt Hannah. Very embarassing.

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I would imagine so. How old were you?

 

Fifteen, had been doing it for eight years though, so they took their time catching me.

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Just because I recently remembered it;

 

When our neighbour attacked at 3amish one time and we phoned the police. They arrived quickly and we were obviously in bed beforehand and too shook up to really think so me and my housemate let them in and realised he was in his boxers, I was in pj bottoms and that was it.

 

Could be misinterpretted...

 

But I've been in many awkward situations. One does spring to mind buet lets not delve into that :p

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Not mine, but witness to it:

 

We were having a conversation about something in school, and my best friend said something (I don't ever remember it being offensive) and the mouth of the year said "go fuck yer dad".

 

I had to break it to her that my best friends dad was indeed dead. I felt awful for my best friend, her face fell and she went quiet for the rest of the day. :(

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Not mine, but witness to it:

 

We were having a conversation about something in school, and my best friend said something (I don't ever remember it being offensive) and the mouth of the year said "go fuck yer dad".

 

I had to break it to her that my best friends dad was indeed dead. I felt awful for my best friend, her face fell and she went quiet for the rest of the day. :(

 

I've had that happen to me numerous times, which is why I'm not so partial to mum jokes. My friend also had the same done to her when her dad recently died when she was 7, fun all round! :heh:

 

I think the worst had to be asking somebody when their baby was due and realised that it was infact them being quite large, I have never felt so mean in my life.. :blank:

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Not mine, but witness to it:

 

We were having a conversation about something in school, and my best friend said something (I don't ever remember it being offensive) and the mouth of the year said "go fuck yer dad".

 

I had to break it to her that my best friends dad was indeed dead. I felt awful for my best friend, her face fell and she went quiet for the rest of the day. :(

 

I've had that happen to me numerous times, which is why I'm not so partial to mum jokes. My friend also had the same done to her when her dad recently died when she was 7, fun all round! :heh:

 

I think the worst had to be asking somebody when their baby was due and realised that it was infact them being quite large, I have never felt so mean in my life.. :blank:

 

I am indeed in the same boat when it comes to the "your mum" or "your dad" kind of jokes.

 

There was a guy who was trying to gain attention back in secondary school, the type of person that loves to be the centre of attention. Well he randomly came to my friend and started saying, "your dad aint sh*t" and "what kind of person is your dad if... (enter derogatory comment here)" as well as some other stuff. As you can guess, my friends father has passed away, so that incident almost ended in a fight just because some dumb guy wanted to grab some attention.

 

Oh, and Letty, I've been in a similar situation regarding a woman who I thought was pregnant, but upon closer observation, I realised she wasn't, and I never did ask her (I can only imagine how bad that would have felt...)

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Once me and my now ex-girlfriend were having a talk/fight and a bird shat on my leg...

 

Awkward for a long time till a burst out laughing and the fight was over.

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Awesome story alert!

 

Although it never happened to me and no-one ever believes me when I tell this, here goes. It's actually really, awful...

 

I was at a friends barbecue in Cyprus and we were all celebrating his dad getting his promotion in the army. Anyways, some wifey who was there went to the toilet in the house and had a poo. To cut the detail, the poo mustn't have flushed and so she rolled it up in toilet paper and tried again. Again it wouldn't flush (dodgy Cypriot toilets). So she did the sensible thing.

She wrapped it in more toilet paper and threw it out of the window.

 

Out of the window. Yes. Now that might not seem too bad but it got worse:

 

The poo (in toilet roll) rolled down the small pantry-alike roof and...almost as if it was meant to be...Landed ON the barbecue with the food. The silence was deafening from the (once) joyous chef. And when she came from the toilet everyone just knew it was her. Her face just dropped and she ran indoors. It was a good job everyone had a sense of humour because she was slaughtered for months and months. Poor lass. I skipped on the food that day though.

 

Possibly the most embarrassing (and hillarious) situation I've seen happen to anyone.

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