I dont know how, but I seem to have given some people the impression here that I no longer talk to my dad or that I dont get on OK with my dad
I made this thread because I didnt know how to react to my dad saying something honest and slightly awkward to me - thats all.
Anyway, someone else gave me advice to say that I appreciate that he has changed and the effort he is putting in etc but not to dismiss his past shitty parenting.
So, I responded to him thusly:
"Thats in the past dad. I have seen the effort you have put in and how you've changed. That has improved our relationship and I really appreciate that. Also, I was going to offer to pick you up actually as you are on my way there and back, plus it'll mean you can have a pint or two if you feel like it. Love you"
K, so.... he hasn't responded yet. I know he will have been awake for at least 3 hours by now. This means one of two things (1) he is going to ring me when he thinks I will be up or (2) he is going to ignore the whole situation and pretend none of the awkward stuff that was said was said.
Its more likely to be option 2 than anything. This is why I didnt want to engage. What is the point when he will just retreat back in to his own personal reality? Ugh.
I dont think my dad will change. I mean, he has put in a lot of effort and changed the way he used to act but he wont change beyond this point. I think its basically impossible for him. I dont hate him for it... I actually feel sorry for him. But there you go.
Sorry to hear about your dad.
I took this advice. But tempered it a bit. I dont know if I have any real desire to move our relationship forwards or anything. I mean, to me, its pretty OK where it is now. My dad has always taught me to be fake in my interactions with people (inlcuding him). I remember when I used to go and see my grandma he would get me to rehears what I was going to say to her before I arrived.
So, sorry to hear that. Your dad sounds like an amazing guy.
I dont know if I want anything beyond what we have now. Probably because I dont expect it to go beyond this point ever. I mean, even with this text thing I am expecting him to just forget about the whole thing by today.